Relax
by MinttBerrryCrunchhh
Summary: It wasn't cuddling when it was with another psychopathic madwoman. Harley/Joker Centric.


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She giggled as he trailed his hand up her right thigh.

His fingers danced across her leg as his lips brushed against her neck. She could feel his cheshire grin.

She smiled and ran her hands through his dirty blonde curls. He moved his kisses to her jaw line, nipping and sucking her soft flesh.

Harley sighed contentedly and placed a finger underneath his chin, bringing his face up to meet hers.

She touched her lips to his. He smiled again.

Harley shivered. The bathroom towel she was lying on wasn't much protection from the ice cold tile beneath her. She wrapped her arms around J's neck and pressed herself closer to his warmth.

The steam was still circulating about the bathroom, hanging around them and fogging up the mirror. She nuzzled his neck and he chuckled. Harley felt his throat vibrate and heard the smooth rumble of his voice.

"Mmmm…Harley," He sighed. She turned her eyes back to his and he placed a kiss to her forehead.

"How's your shoulder?" She whispered.

He pressed his face into her neck again and breathed in her scent. "Just dandy, love."

It had been a rough night for the two of them. Harley's back was riddled with bruises, which had been caused by jumping out of a moving vehicle. J's shoulder, on the other hand, had been the killer. Stabbed and bleeding profusely, Harley had dragged him into the SUV.

"Drive Al, and make it _speedy," _She had hastily commanded, holding J's head in her hands, and wiping the sweat from his brow.

It had taken one look at his boss for Al's eyes to widen and for him to speed off.

When they had arrived at their secret abode, Harley carried her hubby up the stairs to their bedroom with the help of her driver. It had been a struggle to remove his shirt and Harley had finally decided to cut it off him. She had observed the wound and proceeded to dress it.

One outstanding thing about her J: He didn't complain often. He had been the _best_ patient in the world.

For being such a _great_ sport, she decided he needed some kind of _reward_. Besides, Harley was rather tense herself and despite his normal rough demeanor, J was _always_ gentle with his Harley.

Now, they lied naked on the floor of their medium-sized bathroom, bodies damp from their _relaxing_ shower together.

Content.

Happy.

Tired.

She stretched her limbs, her chest rubbing against his as she arched her back.

He kissed the corner of her mouth and asked, "You cold?"

She shrugged. "I'm fine..."

He chuckled, "Harl, don't lie." He grinned lazily at her and placed another kiss on her lips before rising to a standing position.

He stretched his long arms above his head and groaned. Reaching his hand down to her, she grabbed it and pulled herself up, holding his forearms.

He stared at her blue orbs a moment before picking her up roughly and throwing her over his shoulder.

She giggled and he smirked.

He opened the door of the bathroom, letting billows of steam escape into their bedroom.

He dropped her unceremoniously onto the bed.

She bounced as she landed on the soft mattress and giggled again, checking the digital clock on the nightstand.

_2:36._

She yawned and glanced out the window.

All she saw was falling white, and her ears registered the howling of the cold, winter wind.

J had disappeared into the hallway, inevitably turning up the heat.

Her body shivered against the cold even underneath the comforter and she pulled the blanket back to reach her hand to the floor, where she knew his T-shirt would be.

Pulling the black fabric over her torso, she re-covered herself with the downy blanket and turned to her side. Sighing, her eyes fluttered closed.

She heard J's footsteps then.

He made his way toward the bed and crawled in next to her.

He positioned himself so that he was flush against her body, Harley's bottom pressed into his groin. She was so warm. And soft. His Harley.

He released a contented sigh before pressing his lips to the back of her ear.

Harley leaned her blonde head back into his shoulder.

He flicked his tongue against her ear.

She moaned.

"Yes...Jack?"

He nuzzled her neck. "Go to sleep Harls..." The rumble of his voice vibrated the sensitive flesh of her neck.

She sighed.

"Only if you do, _handsome_," Harley grinned, looking up at him. "If anyone needs it...you do." She placed her hand on his left cheek and began to trace his scars across his lips to his right cheek.

He closed his eyes and released a breath. "Harley..." He drawled.

She smiled at him. "Stop it...I love them."

Harley placed a quick peck on his lips. "And you..."

She traced her finger down the side of his face, "Goodnight."

The Joker squeezed her close to him and wrapped his limbs around her waist. He felt her relax into him, her breath becoming even.

The position almost made him laugh.

The Joker.

Infamous.

Psychopathic.

Maniacal.

Incredibly dangerous.

Evil.

No empathy what so ever.

Reduced to _cuddling_.

He winced.

How pathetic.

But all he had to do was look down for all of his thoughts to be erased.

His female twin was next to him.

He grinned and closed his eyes.

It wasn't _cuddling _when it was with another psychopathic madwoman.

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_Fin._

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**A/N: **Hah...Welllll...didn't that suck? I was just in the mood for some _lovely_ Harl/Mistah J cuddles :D

There's rarely any.

So this was created. Pretty fucking great, huh? Yeah. I know. xD

Review?

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_**Go for it. **_


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